Hush-hush
I was never a fan of unrequited feelings.
It was during the first grade when I had my very first crush. Just like any other first crushes, it feels great. It was innocent; it was blissful — more blissful when I realized that he was attracted to me as well.
It was like that ever since. I had a lot of infatuations in the past, and most of them happened to return the feelings as well. Or, when someone shows interest in me, there is always this 60% possibility of liking him back, especially when he is my type. That was the case of my very first (ex) boyfriend.
And since I was (almost) never rejected, I didn’t know how it feels like to have an unrequited love.
Then this man happened.
He was one of those cute guys in the sixth grade when I was in, second grade, I think? He is the type of guy that you’ll always love to look at because he looks fresh, smiles fresh and talks fresh.
Yes, he’s always that fresh. (What am I even saying?)
And then he was gone. He transferred schools, I think? Time passed by, and we, the girls who’s always afar admiring him, forgot about him. However, I remained in contact with his sibling, which happened to be one of my closest friends.
Thank Heavens for technology, because I retraced all my connections via Facebook when I was in highschool. That was when I reconnected (somehow) with his sibling. I have been seeing him all over the profile of his sibling, but I did not bother adding him because he did not know me anyway, and maybe I was just so preoccupied with all of the things that were bothering me. You know high school, right?
Fast forward to the first time — since nine or ten years — that I saw this man again.
He has changed. No, maybe I did not know him well before, because I only knew him by his sibling. But now, he has aged. He has become a young man of integrity who is warm to everyone. He has grown to be the man of any girl’s dreams — the one that you can bring home to your mama and papa. His smile is still as fresh, only more mature.
And now, he recognizes me.
It turned out that he had known me before, of course through his sibling. It’s just that he was a snob before, and did not acknowledge my presence because I was just a little girl, then.
And just all those kilig vibes from second grade was back. Our worlds have become smaller. Everytime he appears, it just get more… I don’t know. Intense?
And between those hello’s and hi-fives, I know, I just know, that I should not let myself fall because he is never going to catch me.
He’s never ready to catch anyone yet. All those girls who are falling and trying to get his attention, he had decided not to catch any of them. Not even one.
And the worst thing is, I know I’m falling fast. He sees me and I see him, but he is unaware of these things that I am hiding.
I may be good at concealing these feelings, but I do believe that the more effort you waste to hide it, the more tendencies it has to show.
And you know it’s getting worse when he starts appearing in your dreams. @#$%^&*!
So this is how it feels to like someone you shouldn’t like, but you can’t help but like them anyway, because they’re too likeable.
This is how it feels, when half of you hope for him not to notice you because it just reminds you of how painful it is to like him, but half of you wish for his attention.
This is how it feels to assume that the things he are doing to you are only for you, and in the end you just get hurt because you realize that these things have no meaning at all. Assumera ka lang.
This is how it feels to have something so close and yet so far.
Now I know why when I ask people how does it feel to have an unrequited love, they couldn’t explain it — because you can never truly understand how hard it is until you’re in their shoes.
Granted Wish: A fangirl's take on her team's grand slam feat
It was 0:26 in 4th Quarter when Rain or Shine PG Paul Lee's crucial and unguarded three pointer did not make it through the basket -- and that's when I knew that the championship was perhaps not meant to be theirs.But I could not be so much confident about winning as I watch Lee's three pointer rattled in and out of the ring. If my team is doing everything for them not to lose their dream history, the other team's just as desperate to stop them as well.
Timeouts were called, fouls were (forcibly) given, and seconds ticked by. My team was missing its crucial free throws. Although we were up by three points, I can never be so sure.
And then the other team's import fired his make-or-break three-point attempt -- a shot that will either delay our grand slam by forcing an overtime, or kill their hopes of stopping our grand slam. Glued on my seat, I could only hold my breath. I was silently wishing for him to miss it.
And he missed it.
The crowd in blue and white roared and went wild as the balloons fell down on them. The San Mig Super Coffee Mixers is not only the 2014 Governor's Cup Champions, but also the 2014 Grand Slam Champions, after dominating three conferences in the whole season.
FALLING (AND STAYING) IN LOVE
I was nine when I first became interested on what my Daddy was watching every other night. Men were throwing balls in baskets, -- I thought it was just about that. But with my father explaining to me how this and that happens (and should happen), I began to understand that basketball is more than just the ball and hoops. There is magic in basketball.
The very first team that I liked in PBA was Purefoods Tender Juicy Hotdogs. That was way back in 2004, the same year that marked the start of the James Yap era.
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| (c) PBA Images |
I remember not being able to watch basketball on a regular basis, unlike my father, because I was such a busy grade schooler, then, but I do remember also that I have never liked any other team aside from Purefoods. Their staff and players come and go, and even their names changed as conferences and seasons passed by, but nothing has changed my fondness of the said team.
Fast forward to when I was in junior high school, when the team was renamed as B-Meg. It was also when Tim Cone entered as their head coach, thus, he implemented his triangle offense technique to boost B-Meg's potentials of bagging championships. I saw how much Marc Pingris improved on his free throw-shooting and defense, and I witnessed many of the downfalls of James Yap, and how he rose each and every time he fails.
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| (c) thellamados.blogspot.com |
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| (c) purefoodsbasketball.com |
One of the most dramatic scenes I have ever witnessed is during the 2012 Commissioner's Cup Finals Game 7 against Talk n Text (my father's favorite team), when B-Meg was down by two, 74-76 in the dying 1.2 seconds of the last quarter. As people thought the game was over, it was revealed that Kelly Williams fouled on B-Meg's import Denzel Bowles with 1.7 seconds left, forcing the latter to take two shots from the free throw line. And as if the Heavens heard the wish of every B-Meg fan across the country, Bowles made his two crucial free throws, sending the team in tears of joy and relief and the game into overtime -- an overtime that was dominated by B-Meg.
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| (c) Photos from AKTV |
And that was when I realized that my love and admiration for this team has grown so much deeper.
But the odds weren't always in our favor, though. Despite being one of teams to beat in the league, the team had its own fair share of games that were almost theirs. Sometimes it hurts -- yes, it hurts a lot -- but this is basketball. The ball is round, and everything is possible. Sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose.
THE COFFEE ERA (2012-present)
It was in 2012 when B-Meg Llamados became the San Mig Coffee Mixers. Little did everyone know that it is under this name that they will have the glory that they have worked so much for.
The 2012-2013 Philippine Cup was an almost there for the team, losing during the semi-finals to Rain or Shine, who eventually lost the championship to Talk n Text. The 2013 Commissioner's Cup was a not quite also, after failing to qualify to the finals, where Alaska won against Ginebra.
After the almosts and the not quites, the Mixers finally won their 10th championship -- the 2013 PBA Governor's Cup --after defeating Petron Blaze Boosters. Marc Pingris emerged as the Finals MVP, Marqus Blakely was hailed as the Best Import of the Conference and Coach Tim Cone had his 13th championship, tying him with his idol Baby Dalupan for the most number of PBA titles.
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| 2013 PBA Governor's Cup Champions (c) Photo from: pba-online.net |
And perhaps because of their 10th championship in the league, the San Mig Coffee Mixers was renamed as the San Mig SUPER Coffee Mixers -- the name that eventually owned the 2013-2014 PBA Season.
I have no words on how the men behind this team performed and worked in order to achieve a rare grand slam feat in the league. In every game, they just work so hard. There will be times that they will lose a game, but I'd like to think that it's okay, because they function so much better when the pressure's on, and when they need to seal a series. Every win is glorious, starting from their success in the 2013 Governor's Cup, their unbelievable win in 2013-2014 Philippine Cup and their victory in 2014 Commissioner's Cup.
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| 2013-2014 PBA Philippine Cup Champions (c) Photo from: pba-online.net |
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| 2014 PBA Commissioner's Cup Champs (3PEAT) (c) Photo from: philstar |
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| 2014 PBA Governor's Cup Champs (Grand Slam!) (c) Photo from: Solar |
But when the crowd in blue and white went wild as the balloons fell down at The Big Dome last night, it was 10x more glorious. All the painful losses and the stupid controversies were instantly gone. After so many years of wishing for this for my favorite team, it's finally theirs.
My wish is granted. Their wish is granted. The grand slam is ours.
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| (c) Photos from: Yahoo! PH |
Labels: basketball, Laban San Mig, PBA, San Mig Coffee Mixers
